Having a child brings about a whole new set of fears. Not only am I responsible for raising Ashley to be a productive member of society, but I am also responsible for her safety and making the right decisions on her behalf. I love her unconditionally. She’s my offspring. My child. My daughter. Me and Ashley, we’re like peas and carrots 
Maybe it’s part of being a mother. The protective nature. The constant worry and anxiety about what could happen. The “what ifs”. Or maybe it’s just my OCD, anxiety-driven personality. Whatever it is, here’s a list of what currently scares me, in no particular order:
– Falling down the stairs while holding Ashley. Or for that matter, falling UP the stairs.
–Getting into a car accident with Ashley in the back seat.
– Something happening to Van or I. I couldn’t bear the thought of Ashley growing up without both of her parents.
– Someone kidnapping Ashley in the middle of the night. So I double check all the locks before going to bed. This may be a result of watching too many baby-snatching stories on TV.
– SIDS or breathing difficulties in the middle of the night. We have a video monitor that I keep next to my side of the bed so I can see AND hear anything going on in her nursery.
– My milk supply decreasing.
– Ashley getting sick.
– The boys accidentally stepping on her.
– Her bath water being too hot, too cold, or even drowning in her bath. I’ve heard horrible stories of babies drowning or even sustaining burns from turning on the hot water during that quick second when the parent gets distracted.
– Choking. Especially now that I’m introducing solid food to her.
These are just a few of the things that have been on my mind. I realize some of them might sound a little crazy, and maybe they are. But they all could happen. Will there ever be a day when I don’t worry about her? Probably not. Life is so precious and things can change in the blink of an eye. Your world revolves around different things once you have children. Different priorities. Different anxieties. I know as she gets older there will be more things to be worried about – violence in schools, driving, boyfriends – YIKES! I don’t know how my parents did it. At least now I can keep her in our little bubble, shielded from the craziness of the world. And as for my fears, sometimes you just gotta trust that everything is going to be alright and use a little common sense every now and then. But don’t forget to have FUN and LAUGH along the way!
Niki Murray